Rest in peace

[@pple]

Outside the elders’ den sat a cat in the quiet clarity of solitude. Any cat would suffer from loneliness. However, there was a smirk pasted on the cat’s lips. A smirk, yes. It was a smirk that would spook a mouse away.

After so many moons being held a prisoner…in her own body, being possessed by a lost spirit of her ancestors, the ancient medicine cat never felt so free. Once a grumpy, cranky, and unpleasant character, she was in a total bliss. The spirit, she did not dare to utter the cursed name. However, she was glad that the spirit was gone. Gone.

It had been a moon and a quarter that she had her own self back. It felt so good to be back. In control. To have her body back. Flexing her muscles, she stretched and gave herself a good yawn.

Her eyes were no longer poison black anymore. Bright purple eyes sparkled. Her lover, Walldrop, the young prince, was away on an evening patrol. Catching herself smiling at the image of the handsome deputy made her cringe a…bit.

She knew she is not a medicine cat anymore. So she is free to have him all to herself. Loving someone is not forbidden now. Being in love is not a taboo now. However, her duty as a medicine cat died hard. Being raised to be a goody shoes medicine cat, her mentor instructed her not to fall in love. It is the first thing she learned aside from the green leaves and infected wounds. Broken bones, she knew, but not broken hearts. When the queens came inside her den, they wept and spoke of the words she always heard over and over again, but herself, even an old cat now, still did not know.

Enough of her young prince. Laughing at the foolish thought, she walked back inside the elders’ den with a pleasant demeanor.

Two elders were busy bathing in the warm sunlight. They looked happy. Even though they tend to be cranky and complain about fleas and annoying apprentices, they looked like they are at peace. That is nice. They deserve that. After many seasons of their service to the clan.

Glancing around the camp, the former medicine cat remembered the apprentices’ den. She remembered the first night she slept in there with other apprentices. The others and herself could not sleep so they chattered endlessly about what the future would bring them. After a few days of warrior training, once she saw the herbs, she fell in love instantly. Giving up her dream of becoming a warrior, she joined in the medicine cats’ pawsteps. She never regret her choice. She was proud of taking care of her clan. Even she missed her old mentor, she knew that he was proud of her now.

Seasons passed. Age did not take a toll on her health yet, until she decided it was time for her to retire. Retirement. It was one thing she never thought about. Since she was a kit, she never thought about the elders. Never thought that she would ever become one herself. She grew up dreaming to fight for her clan, taking care of them, but did not think a single thought about being an elder.

To be an elder is a very special privilege. Very few reached old age. Living into the wild is tough and harsh. Many died young. Everyone in the clan respected the elders for their long, long service.

It is very rare for medicine cats to retire. Otherwise, they remain medicine cats all their lives, serving their clan even in their old age. Growing very old, she decided to put her duty aside and celebrate the rest of moons by rest and comfort of her clanmates. Even she would not like to brag, but she is the most highly respected member of the whole clan.

She gave herself a small smile at the thought. It was such a comfort. It felt good to be respected and adored by others.

[/blockquote]

[Waterfrost]

(so sorry it took me forever! Distractions >.<)

How does one escape her fate? Is it true about how everything that happens in your life and where you'll end up has been laid out the day you are born? Is it at all possible to change directions? Oh, please let that be the case.

A small jet-black she-cat allowed herself to be revealed and be bathed with the last bit of sunshine in the cool leaf-fall day. The silver streak on her side was almost completely blended in with the dim lighting of the camp, but her silver right paw shown as a pretty gray as she cautiously stepped out of the medicine cat den, a ball of moss clamped in between her jaws.

Shadowsong. That is the name the young medicine cat was given. The name symbolizing her fate....she shuddered at the word. I thought it was supposed to be simple after this....Well, it was simple, the way she forced herself to see it as well as any outsider looking at her life. She was now the medicine cat of Moonclan with a whole list of responsibilities. One including looking after her clanmates. Shadowsong cared for her clanmates, but it was hard when no one had ever showed her any love....

She gritted her teeth at the thought of a specific apprentice. No, he hadn't shown her love. He had shown her friendship, but she pushed him away, and now that she was officially a medicine cat? She shoved him to the back of her mind where cobwebs collected. No more hurt. No more confusion. Her job was to be Moonclan's medicine cat, and that's what she would do, even if she seemed like a dark shadow doing it.

She allowed nothing else into her mind. That was that. She would no longer allow a silly tom to affect her views on being a medicine cat. She was stronger than that. No, she never wanted to be a medicine cat, that was true, but she couldn't just abandon and betray her clan......

The sweet smell of a mouse filled her scent glands as the shadowy figure carried the fresh-kill and moss over to the elders den. It was a little on the skinny side, with mostly bones, but prey was starting to get scarce and the hunting patrols would be back soon to bring something else to the elders. The she-cat just needed to do something other than collect herbs and stay in her nest all day. She had grown tired of it, even if it meant staying clear of everyone, which was what she always wanted.

Intending to head straight over to the entrance and mew a greeting, Shadowsong nearly bumped into another cat. She was surprised she hadn't, for her mind was clouded and focused on only getting to the elders.

Her jaws opened, releasing the mouse and moss, and took a step back to face her old mentor. "Appleblossom," she mewed softly. Her solemn voice carried heavy emotion with it that couldn't be defined. What Shadowsong had felt was sorrow and confusion before, but she had refused to admit to it. Now as she looked at Appleblossom, a recently retired medicine cat, with anger stirred inside her, but her expression showed nothing except cloudiness. The fact that she retired instead of continuing to teach Shadowsong gave her great resentment for her old mentor. She still had lots to learn, and she had hoped being under Appleblossom's guidance a little bit longer, until at least Nettlepaw became a warrior, she would have warmed up to the idea of being a full medicine cat and forgotten about the warrior path. As if that was possible, but she had been desperate.

No. She shook the image of the heart-achingly handsome tabby almost immediately so as to not allow it to affect her or her thought process. She was a young medicine cat who had an apprentice, and she hadn't been one long! It hadn't even been a moon when Ravenpaw, permanently injured in her shoulder, was forced into her paws. Now, there was no going back, and it was all Appleblossom's fault. She used to look up to Appleblossom and respect her......but she knew the real reason for her retirement. Yes, she had been trapped by the spirit inside her for quite some time and deserved some rest, but there was something much greater involved. It involved a tom. And not just any tom. It was Walldrop, the deputy of Moonclan. Medicine cats weren't allowed to have mates, but now that Appleblossom was retired, she was free to have a mate if she wanted to. How did Shadowsong know this? Well, like a shadow, she was capable of hiding more than just her song of torment.

From Shadowsong's perspective, Moonclan was doomed......and so was she.

[@pple]

After many moons of sharing her body with the spirit, she did not know what the spirit uncovered. Those moons feel like a hole in her mind. Things are not the same as before. It has been hard on the old medicine cat. She certainly deserve rest and peace for the upcoming seasons.

Having no idea how her apprentice, Shadowsong, felt gave her some innocence. Appleblossom did not know of her dark torment. Of her dark love for a cat much like hers. Apparently, she did not know any of this, but she felt tension rising and awkward silence came as Shadowsong came in the den.

Sighing, Appleblossom greeted her politely, "Shadowsong." Again, she did not know where to start. Should she ask her about how she feel? She absolutely had no idea about Shadowsong's feelings, but being an old cat gave her knowledge about others' feelings and emotions. Though they may don't like each other, they are much same.

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[Eclïp§e]

{I may I post here?^_^}

[Waterfrost]

(I know I had no excuse to not be on because of break, but I will try to post as soon as I can. Sorry, Apple. If it's ok with Apple, it's alright with me. )

[@pple]

((Sure thing, Eclipse! Go ahead and post. Waterfrost, it is ok, lol. Take your time. ))

[Eclïp§e]

{Yay! Leafsong has always wanted too be a medicine cat,though Tigerpaw has always wanted too meet Appleblossom.^^}


Tigerpaw's orange tabby fur was slick and clean,fit for meeting Appleblssom,he smiled shyly as he spotted the elder and newest medicine cat talking,though he didn't want too intrude he'd love too speak with either. They where both intresting,yet he hadn't figuired out exactly why Shadowsong was always sitting in her den in despair,probably because of Appleblossom retiring,and he could very understand that,if Twilightstar retired and he'd have a heart attack. The crude large tom gave a large smile and stepped in,"H-h-h-ello?" He spoke stutteringly.

[@pple]

The ancient feline looked up from Shadowsong, her purple eyes catching a glimpse of a young apprentice. In the past, she hate apprentices. They are stupid and naive. Trying hard not to scowl at the apprentice, Appleblossom gave the young tom a brief nod and greeted politely, "Tigerpaw."

Ignoring an impluse to tell the apprentice to go away and search for something else to do, Appleblossom decided to be nice this time. This nervous apprentice really seemed to be on the edge. He do not look like he belong to the world of battles. The former medicine cat looked up and down at him, checking out his large, crude frame. His body may be warrior-made, but the look on his face did not. That is why Appleblossom found him mysterious.

Shaking her head at the strange thoughts, Appleblossom looked back at Shadowsong. She let out a long, grave sigh. She really wanted to talk with Shadowsong, to solve everything out. The tension between Shadowsong and herself was troubling and lurking into her heart. She tried hard not to shudder. Glancing back at Tigerpaw, she asked him sweetly, "What's the matter? Do you get hurt?" Even though she knew he was not harmed.

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[Eclïp§e]

Tigerpaw nodded,"Y-y-a. I got this huge thorn in my paw." He gulped,wincing as he heard it with his own ears,he lifted up his paw and a massive thorn was stuck in his pad. He yelped a bit and bit into his bottom lip. Flicking his tail nerviously he glanced at Shadowsong,his face innocent,"A-a-and I wanted too meet you Appleblossom. My friend Leafsong has always admired you and I've always heard of you thoughtfully s-s-so I thought i'd like too meet you. It's an honor too see you by the way Appleblossom." He dipped his head too the ground in deep respect. You could tell by his eyes he was speaking thoughtfully to the retired medicine cat.

[@pple]

Appleblossom glanced at her former apprentice, Shadowsong, waiting for her to fidget around and get to work. Even though she would like to take care of Tigerpaw's thorn wound. After all, getting a thorn is common. Luckily, it is easily removed with a few pulls by using teeth. The old medicine cat glanced down at the thorn then looked away swiftly, not making any eye contact. Appleblossom couldn't help, but to give him another friendly, polite smile when he spoke of her highly. She liked it, but she knew that Shadowsong somehow disliked it. That brought her back to a fierce desire of herself to talk with her to solve everything. However, there are obstacles that block her from getting any alone time with her former apprentice.

Even Appleblossom dislike apprentices, she really cared deeply for Shadowsong. Shadowsong is like her daughter, the one she never had. She is really worried about her. Shaking her head, she dipped her head toward Tigerpaw, "Thank you, Tigerpaw."

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[Eclïp§e]

He blushed,"Your welcome Appleblossom." He wondered if the former medicine cat liked him? He knew she liked Shadowsong,or else why would she train her so well? Though they normally stayed in the medicine cat den Tigerpaw always managed too pry Ravenpaw out too get some fresh air and talk with him someway or another. His paw hanging limply by his side,he smiled at them both,"Did you want me too get you anything? I mean I think i'll be fine when this thorn is out my paw. I know your not helpless but I was just wondering.." He pondered.

[@pple]

Appleblossom rose to her paws. If Shadowsong is not willing to help Tigerpaw, then she is going to help the apprentice. Sighing, she came closer to Tigerpaw, her sweet scent of apples that heed her name flew around him. She bet it overwhelm him. Looking cautiously at the thorn that is stuck in his paw, she gently pulled it out with her teeth. Spitting it out, she gave him a polite smile, "You are fine now. Shadowsong will get you some poppyseeds to numb the irriation. Or whatever she chooses."

"Ah, I am good. Thank you, Tigerpaw." She smiled then glanced toward Shadowsong, waiting for her to reply.

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[Waterfrost]

(I am so sorry. I'm trying to get back into the swing of things. It seems like forever. )

The black medicine cat blinked in realization to the real world. Overwhelming thoughts and emotions, most she couldn't distinguish, for they were too confusing and too many, had been blocking her thought pattern. She watched with much dislike as Appleblossom took Tigerpaw into her own hands, though she wasn't really complaining considering she hated her job. It was worse when Tigerpaw was going on about how great she was. Stupid, naive, little furball! Her tail lashed harshly around her paws as she supervised the two cats' progress with narrowed eyes at Tigerpaw, refusing to meet Appleblossom's eyes at all costs.

When her former mentor mentioned her getting poppyseeds, she opened her mouth to respond harshly but thought better about it; they had company, after all. Seeing as the wound wasn't bleeding or swelling, she found poppyseeds to be the best way to treat it, but she wasn't happy about it. Muttering something like 'she can't boss me around anymore' under her breath, she dashed off to the medicine cat den in search of something for the apprentice's thorn wound. Hmm...I could use dandelion roots.... But she didn't want to find something other than what Appleblossom had suggested just to prove a point.

Sighing when she had found nothing else that would help better than poppyseeds, Shadowsong delicately placed a few on a leaf before taking her time to get to Tigerpaw and Appleblossom. "Eat these," she muttered to him. "They will keep you from complaining about any soreness or irritation. You should still be able to carry out your apprentice duties, but if something happens to make it worse, come find me." You better not, she thought severely, for he would probably go on and on about the former medicine cat.

[Eclïp§e]

Tigerpaw gave his goofy smile,"Thanks Shadowsong. I will." Though the intelligent tom knew better than to visit her again. This was risky enough letting her trust in him fall through the cracks. Though Ravenpaw could probably help him. He sucked up the seds,now a bit dazed,he sat down,"Mind if I stay and chat with you two?" The clan gossip wasn't his thing but Twilightstar must know if something she didn't have any idea about going on through her camp. A paw cocked the poppyseeds started to make him go a bit woozy.

{It's okay.^*^}

[@pple]

Appleblossom did not look at Shadowsong. It ached her heart to see the fact that Shadowsong would not look at her. Keeping her face a solid look, she looked at the apprentice, "No, Tigerpaw. I would love your company, but you must take rest. I have to talk with Shadowsong in private. Would you mind?" She looked at Tigerpaw and knew that the apprentice would not refuse her. It is nice to know that everybody would not turn her down. But Shadowsong...the thought made her feel miserable.